This is my Mother’s Day Gift from Haley. Do you love it? See the prior blog post for a description of what I am offering people.
My daughter is very talented. We worked with the colors, the fonts, the hair, the eyes. I don’t know how she has the patience. She moves this layer and that, changes it back and forth. Over and over and over and over again. If it was me doing it, I would have been screaming in frustration. She is amazing.
Thank you again, Haley. This was an awesome Mother’s Day gift!!!!
The planning genie is coming alive today. Together, my daughter and I are creating my new logo. It is my Mother’s Day gift.
“It is great to ask for what you want,” one of my mentors said.
And I did. Rather than my daughter driving 8 hours round trip to see me, I asked her if we could spend two hours re-stating my brand, and developing my logo.
So here’s the deal: I don’t know why I am great at planning.
All I know is that something magical happens, hence the name.
When you begin working with The Planning Genie, you might start talking about a vague idea that you have, or a project you’ve wanted to do, but you’ve either been confused, or don’t know where to begin.
In our half hour, you will get into dialogue with me, and in the process, get clear on your purpose, passion or project. Your energy will alter and you will get in touch with your unique gifts and talents.
We will also develop a 90 day plan. It will identify milestones and doable simple tasks that lead to the fulfillment of your purpose or project. We schedule these tasks right into your calendar.
All of a sudden, you will realize that you CAN accomplish your projects, dreams and goals. You can have what you want in your life. You can have enjoyment and fulfillment. All you have to do is follow the plan.
I also offer a program where you can work with me to stay accountable for your tasks and milestones. It keeps the plan in existence and through our weekly conversations, you will remove the barriers, considerations and distractions that may be keeping you from staying on track.
The planning and service are truly remarkable (if I do say so myself). due to our empowering partnership and trust.
I am so excited to be offering this service. And I thank my daughter for working with me to define and represent this new service.
But it’s true. You will have to watch the video for that one. I really had a great time recording it.
Last night I was so mad at my ex. I could not see a way out of my torture.
I finally found freedom which I talk about on the video.
Also, I went shopping today for food. OMG. It’s like a sci fi movie. I know I’ve been lucky to have my son shop for me, but I really wanted Stew Leonard’s tuna salad. (I bought 3). I also bought 6 of the whole grain bagels that I love. I cut them into thirds and froze them. I think I am cheating on the points, thought. The pieces weigh 2 ounces which is 5 points and I only put them down for one ounce (2). UGH. I said I’d be honest so I will fix that. Bummer.
OK, I fixed it. I don’t want to start cheating again. That’s how I end up gaining weight. Lying to myself just doesn’t work.
I sometimes wonder if life will ever be “normal” again. Then I think “do I really want it to be?” Then I think, this is really fucked up. Then I think, I better just stop thinking because there’s no good alternative here:
stay alone forever
go back to how it was
who the fuck knows?
None of them seem too good, right?
OR, create your life the way you want it. Well, that’s what I am trying to do with my new self:
The Planning Genie
Except I googled genie and it said “feral child.” That’s not really a positive.
Well, I’ll just have to sit with it. It will probably change tomorrow.
I work through a bunch of stuff in this video. Creating freedom while recording. Very powerful and very cool. Enjoy it!!
I had taken on “acceptance” this week. Yesterday I forgot and was NOT ACCEPTING anything.
Then, I realized I could accept “not accepting.” And then I got free.
I also used my “not resisting” technique to distinguish something HUGE. I’ve had a conversation that “no one cares” about me since the age of 2. It has seemed real and I have a bunch of evidence for it.
When I told my friend “curly,” (not his real name), that I didn’t think he cared, he was stupefied. He pointed out all the things that he wouldn’t be doing if he didn’t care.
“Wow,” I said. “I would never have looked at this from your point of view. That gives me a whole ‘nother way more empowering way to look at things. Thank you.” I finally relaxed and the fear was gone.
Then I had a conversation with someone else about my ex husband.
“When I married him, he was an Ivy League educated lawyer,” I said. “Not that that meant anything, but I never would have thought he’d be living at my mother’s house for free 26 years later. I’m embarrassed for him. That my family had to ask him to move out makes me feel a little sick. But, I guess it’s just what he’s doing right now. He’s not upset about it so why should I be?.”
I thought about it a little more.
“I guess if I don’t interact with him like he’s a pathetic loser, I could just accept him exactly how he is, without the story. He’s doing the best he can. I don’t need to take on other people’s opinions, or judgments as if they are the truth. I can just interact with him human to human.”
I continued. “I guess I can do the same thing with my mom. She is doing the best she can. She is happy. I can be sad when I’m sad, but let go of the story about it. Let go of that it shouldn’t be this way. ACCEPT IT.”
What a novel concept. Accept what’s so!!!!
Another thing: I am going to do the 21 day abundance meditation again. I will do it with my daughter and at least one friend starting Saturday. If anyone wants to do it, let me know. I just finished it and money was flowing in. It’s quite incredible. I want the money stream to keep coming!!!!
I love acknowledging people. It creates a space of empowerment. The person hearing it feels good, and I feel good knowing that they are getting what is great about them.
I don’t know why. It’s just that way.
Well, today I got acknowledged. I was in a course and one of the guys that I gave a half hour planning session to mentioned that I really helped him. I had reached out to him when I kept hearing him talk about the book he was writing.
“Have you started writing it yet?”
“You need a session with me,” I boldly said.
He took me up on it. After his session, he scheduled 4 hours a week into his calendar to write. And guess what? He’s writing. This is HUGE! Before that he couldn’t enjoy anything because he always felt like he SHOULD be writing and he wasn’t. It altered his life in a great way. He is FREE and getting the book written. It’s so cool.
It was the second time he mentioned me on a big webinar. I have to admit I loved it.
Then, someone said I “brought my village with me.” It was my daughter, mom, and two friends that were visiting our course. Normally I don’t have many people attend. It was really fun to have them AND I loved hearing my name mentioned. Again, I’m admitting this, shameful as that is.
The third time, which I couldn’t remember in the video, was when someone told my mom that they all “loved Hilary.” And then my coach said, “yes we do.” I have to say I was tickled beyond belief. They love me? How freaking cool is that? It’s what I’ve always wanted yet was afraid to believe could really happen.
When the webinar was over, my daughter called me.
“Mom, you REALLY were the queen today. I was so proud of you.”
“I know,” I said, giggling. “How cool was that? I’m going to enjoy it while it lasts.”
Honestly I couldn’t have planned that for the life of me. I guess I’m just sharing myself and being public about what I’m up to and the exploration I’ve been in. It enlivens me to go beyond my comfort zone and explore new conversations and horizons.
I took on “BEING REAL” back in the beginning of September. And since then I’ve launched my YouTube channel, published my book, started Half Hour with Hilary and have a web site. Not to mention altering people’s lives with my sessions.
I’m not the person I was even back in August. Maybe I’m bragging, but that’s ok. I AM PROUD. And, I hope you are doing something that YOU are proud of. If not, you definitely can. Please contact me. I’d love to help you create a life that you can also be proud of. It’s REALLY FUN!
OK signing off. Time to relax for once. I have to remember how.
Wow! Last night I couldn’t sleep. My heart was racing.
Instead of resisting it, I decided to just experience the feeling and allowed myself to feel the panic. I was scared to have conversations about my program’s cost with potential clients.
My heart was still beating furiously. After a few moments of not being able to stand it, a childhood memory popped into my head. One of my friends “unfriended me.’ This was before facebook. And the incident repeated itself several times. I saw the strategy I had created to try to avoid this unpleasant happening: be nice, don’t speak up and be good. I could see how this was limiting me.
I forgave, processed it, and now I am moving on.
It was important for me if I ever want to be able to generate a larger income. I need to stand for myself, ask for what I want, and be clear about my value instead of just standing by and watching.
Since yesterday, I’ve gotten two new clients. This is a total miracle. I have been talking about generating more income for 3 years, and haven’t made one dollar of extra income outside of my day job.
Another miracle: I have interns coming to work with me for 3 weeks who understand social media. Because my “day” office is closed, they are allowed to work with me on my other “new” business. I am so excited. They can help me streamline and organize all this “stuff” that I’ve been working on.
Both were not happening as of yesterday. This is a total creation from the universe.
I don’t care if it sounds WOOWOO. I love WOOWOO.
I have 6 minutes to finish before our power hour is up.
I finally got my IRS payment information to be accepted last night and the money was in my account this morning. Another miracle.
This video talks about the miracles some more. I also show you the crashing loud waves outside my beach cottage.
I’m in a race. I only have 2 minutes to write this. So it will be short.
I’m working through my limits. I’m afraid to ask people to pay me. It feels like a physical thing but I’m sure it’s not. Just body sensations.
I’m afraid of doing it wrong. I have.
I’m afraid it will be awkward. It is.
I’m afraid they will say no. They have.
I’ve practiced on 5 people so far and I guess the worse has already happened and I didn’t die from it.
What if I could be free and enjoy learning and exploring?
Why can’t I just do that?
I DON’T KNOW.
I’M LOOKING, OK?
Maybe I’m afraid of actually being successful. What would I have to do then? What would I complain about?
Oh, that’s not a problem, I answer. I can always find something. (There’s always my weight!)
OK, more later.
I’ve had some time to calm down. I am nervous for my 6:00 conversation. I am going to relax and just be present. Find out what this person wants and “GET REAL” with her about if she really wants to accomplish it. If not, fine. If yes, great. Either way I will survive.
I guess I’m going beyond what’s comfortable for my little paradigm. So, bring it, world. Let’s get crazy and dangerous!!! After all, I can burn my ear on the phone, right? Or, she can hang up on me and it will be really loud and damage my eardrum!!! What else can really happen? I guess I could get insulted or rejected. Will that kill me? I hope not.
I will give you an update tomorrow.
I know, the song is LET’S GET LOUD (not crazy and dangerous). That’s what I’m hearing in my mind. I’m going to dance now!!
Here’s the video where I also try to work through this resistance.
In 45 minutes: I wrote an article for my friend, Marie, for her Good News project and emailed it to her. I recorded a video. I wrote this blog – well, started it – and I read 15 minutes.
And I always think I don’t do enough. I guess I can give that one up. I think that’s amazing productivity for 45 minutes. !!! YAY!!!
Thanks for listening. Stay healthy and safe please.
I went for a walk to try to clear my mind. It didn’t work.
I decided to do a video and see what came out.
What emerged was two issues that were niggling me. I didn’t even know it. They just came out when I was talking.
You’ll have to watch to find out what they are. It’s not that interesting, but they were certainly disturbing me. I now have a plan, so I can put them aside.
OK, I’m back. Another thing that I can not get handled:
I am trying to put in my bank account information for the stimulus check. I put the information in accurately from my taxes, but it still rejects it. After 3 tries, you have to wait 24 hours to try again. I have been trying to do this since Saturday.
Today I used the cues that the system gives. I looked up my street address. The post office has a different street name. When I put this (wrong) name in, it recognized me and said I was eligible for the check. Progress.
But when I entered in my tax information, it rejected me again. DAMN. Of course I tried 3 times.
Now I have to wait another 24 hours. “No need to call the IRS,” it says. Unbelievable.
I will put this aside until tomorrow.
I just like to check things off my list. Is that so WRONG?
That’s all for now. Not exciting, but, it doesn’t have to be exciting to be annoying.
I personally don’t want to go back to stress, the grind, rushing, and never feeling like I’m getting anywhere.
What about a life doing what we love? Where we can pay people to do what we don’t love?
Wouldn’t that be great. Why not?
Well, all the reasons that I have for why not come rushing to my mind:
I don’t know how
Who am I to do something like that?
Why really wants what I have to offer?
I’ve tried that before and it didn’t work
I CAN’T DO IT RIGHT
I don’t want to bother people
Maybe it won’t work and then where will I be?
They are all from the past and designed to keep me small and have a life I don’t enjoy. What is the worst case? I keep failing until I succeed.
Well, I don’t like to fail.
Well, too bad. Success and failure come as a package.
(Do you like the way I argue with myself?)
OK, FINE. I guess the alternative is to dread the future and what good is that?
I’m in sales. And, I’ve been dreading having to go back to that world.
What I discover on my video is the negativity that the word “Sales” evokes in my mind. I am replacing the word with “taking care of people.” I love to do that. I love to listen and leave them free and empowered. That is something I can look forward to. I am just changing the way I phrase what I do so I don’t keep worrying about what is to come. I’m just changing the way I see it? It’s free and something I can do.
Enjoy. I’m in the process of discovering my reinvented life. Reach out if you want to have a conversation about reinventing yours. On my web site, http://www.gettingrealwithhilary.com, there is a form you can fill out that sends me an email. I will get in touch with you and we can have a really fun, empowering conversation that leaves you in a new place.
Hope to hear from you. Let’s create a new fun world together.