“This will not work if you’re negative,” my marketing guy, I will call him Stan, said.
“Well, I’m just disappointed,” I said. “I paid you alot of money and this isn’t working.”
“We have not given up helping you,” Stan said. “And we are not charging you additional money.”
I stopped listening while he kept talking………
“We’ve gone over this before. If you are negative, this won’t work, ……..I told you what to do the last 3 weeks and you haven’t done it…this takes work……being an entrepreneur doesn’t happen over night……….”
I felt like a 5 year old. He wasn’t HEARING ME!! All he was doing was lecturing me. He had the audacity to say they were helping me for FREE. I PAID THEM A LOT OF MONEY LAST YEAR AND THIS HASN’T WORKED!!!
“We told you we would help you be successful. That’s why we work on this every day. We haven’t given up, but if you are going to be negative, we should all stop right now.” He finally finished.
My face was frozen in a scowl. I wanted to tell him to just fucking give the whole thing up and fuck you very much. I just stared into the zoom camera, not willing or able to speak.
I could just say ok. Let’s stop the nonsense. He was calling my bluff. Did I really want to do that? Maybe not.
“You know what it is,” I finally said, voice breaking. “I feel stupid. I really thought this was going to work. I had an unfulfilled expectation that I would be successful, make back my investment, and be making money by now. I’m just REALLY disappointed.”
“We are too. But we are not giving up unless you do. And you need to have a positive attitude,….”
“Can you PLEASE stop telling me to be positive? This is as good as it’s getting right now. I may be different in 5 minutes, but right now this is ALL YOU’RE GETTING!! And please stop saying you are working for free – I PAID YOU A LOT OF MONEY AND I’M DISAPPOINTED.”
Silence on both our parts.
“OK,” I said. “I will give up that I am stupid. It’s familiar. I am telling myself I was stupid for thinking I could do this and now I am being right about how I am stupid. I can give that up.”
“You are actually courageous,” he said.
“Thank you. OK, I will say I am smart, brave and courageous instead of stupid. And I will be positive. I can do this. I will contact 20 of these people a week.”
“How about 25 a week? 5 a day?”
“UGH. OK. I will force myself.”
“Fine. I will be positive. Thank you.”
“Sometimes I just need to kick you in the butt.”
“Yes, you do.”
That was that. Now I have to contact 5 potential referral sources a day. My brain is telling me I don’t know how, etc. And, I don’t have to listen to it.
Have a great day and thanks for listening. I am smart, brave and courageous. How are you?