7 Steps to Stop Suffering

I’m going to lead a breakout session in a course I’m in and need to pick a topic by tomorrow.

I’d like the inquiry to be one that I am interested in rather than one where I think I know the answer.

I’m looking at Being vs Suffering

Today I was being present and enjoying my life. I was about to lead a “planning” call and took a look at how I’m doing on my own plan. By Oct 21 I will transform 4 areas – career, home, course and relationships.

I’m doing great on my career and my home. I am sticking and choosing “what is.” I saw what wasn’t working and added workability to both.

  • I am staying in my winter beach cottage and enjoying the winter months. I will relook at “home” when I have to move in the spring.
  • In my career, I saw that it was one little piece that wasn’t working and I am redesigning it so that that piece works as well. Most of what I want is already in place.

In dating and in my course, I was doing fine until I looked at my results. All of a sudden I started suffering. I had a terrible date on Tuesday and I currently only have 1 person registered for my course starting in October.

My old familiar “story” kicked in: I can’t have what I want, I’m stupid for thinking I can, and it’s really all hopeless.

Wow. In an instant my thoughts got “stuck” in their old patterns and the suffering began.

How to bring BEING to my story?

  • See that I made it all up
  • See what the payoff is for keeping it in place.

The payoff is that I get to be a victim, right about how I can’t have what I want, and powerless to do anything about it. While that doesn’t SEEM like a payoff, it gets me off the hook for putting myself out there and being vulnerable. It’s safer to just stay stuck.

What can I do about it?

  • Recognize the story
  • See if I really want to stay stuck in my story
  • If so, keep it and suffer
  • If not, let it go and
  • Get back into action.

I can take a whole bunch of actions:

  • Select more guys
  • Dress up and feel good about myself
  • Get out of my house
  • Share about my course
  • Talk about my book again
  • Schedule podcasts
  • Schedule book talks.

There are actions I CAN take when I stop making myself wrong. The world opens up and I get my power back.

That’s a miracle.

So what can my inquiry be about?

From Suffering to Being?

What’s Being In Relationships?

What’s Being in Regards to Our Self and Our Stories?

What’s Being with Regards to Our Future?

Something like that. Nothing is jumping out at me yet. Well, I will meditate on it and pick something by tomorrow. It’s a work in progress.

Thanks for listening.

3 thoughts on “7 Steps to Stop Suffering

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