This Is How Not Getting What I Wanted Gave Me A New Life!

The other night, something was supposed to happen that didn’t.  A woman I knew was going to join me on a call and she didn’t. 

In an instant I saw myself get immediately depressed. Even though it wasn’t a huge deal in reality, I went south.  Onto the “other side” as I call it.  I had been happy one moment, got her text, and all of a sudden life sucked and I didn’t know why.  My energy changed, my attitude changed, my body started hurting, and I just wanted to go to sleep or break out the wine, chips and hummus.

I decided, rather than start drinking or escaping to bed, to look at what happened by using the tools in my course, the Getting Unstuck With Hilary program. And this week’s homework was to tell your story. 

I was telling a very familiar story and I kept hearing myself say, very sadly and with a lot of suffering, I can’t have what I want over and over and over again.

I went back to the little incident from when I was two, knowing that’s where it came from. Even though knowing that had never given me any freedom and made no sense, it still kept happening.

Today, using my course technique,  I saw it in a different way for the first time. 

When I was two, I just didn’t get what I wanted.  My brain made up that I can’t EVER have what I want to protect me from being disappointed. That’s the brain’s job. It thinks we’re still in survival from the jungles, but we’re not. 

Today I finally saw it differently.  I just didn’t get what I wanted THAT DAY. Two year olds aren’t supposed to get everything they want.  That’s just life. It doesn’t mean I can’t have what I want for the rest of MY ENTIRE LIFE.

And in that moment, my whole life opened up.   I don’t have to suffer over that anymore. It’s just not TRUE.  It’s just a place I was stuck. 

And now, I’m free to create the life I love, which is my commitment, that we all get to create lives we love. 

Is there a place where you silently suffer and you don’t know why? Well, take a look at it and see if you can create some freedom. 

And if not, you can always go to and we can get you free together, because it’s really fun.

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