Stick a Brush Where? In What Hole?

Two weeks ago I had gum surgery.

I went for my checkup yesterday.

I am doing fine. Great. I started getting up to leave.

“Get her the brush,” the periodontist said.

The assistant looked at him with her eyebrow raised.

“Yes, get it,” he said.

He showed me how to put together this little brush. He put it in the NEW dastardly hole between my teeth and showed me how to move it around.

“It’s not so bad,” he said watching my face grimace in disgust.

“How often do I have to do this?” I asked.

“Every time you eat.”

“Seriously?” I asked. “Really?” Again I made a not so attractive face.

“This shouldn’t be a problem. It’s no big deal,” they said.

I walked out of the building feeling like I was making a big deal out of something that they seemed to think was so MUNDANE.

Well, it’s not MUNDANE to me. It FEELS LIKE A BIG DEAL.

So, rather than suffer with my internal monologue I am going to vent it all out here. Ready? This is unfiltered venting.

I HATE HAVING A HOLE BETWEEN MY TWO FRONT TEETH.

IT HURTS!! AND IT HURTS EVEN MORE AFTER I STICK THAT BRUSH IN THERE.

I have never brushed my teeth after every meal. I DON’T WANT TO!

I FEEL LIKE I’M MAKING THE HOLE BIGGER BY STICKING THAT BRUSH IN THERE!!!

This whole thing just makes me feel old. There’s no going back. It’s only downhill from here. I’ll be finding more amd more places to stick brushes and pretty soon I won’t have any time for anything else.

It’s my fault. If I had just made a dentist appointment earlier, I wouldn’t have gotten the gum infection and I wouldn’t have this DAMN HOLE!!!

I hate when I put my tongue there and there’s a HUGE HOLE!!! It shouldn’t be this way!!!!

It’s not fair!

It will never be better. It can only get worse per the doctor. I still have pockets and if I don’t do this I will get MORE POCKETS AND MORE HOLES!!!! OY VAY!

Let’s see – is there anything else?

YES – I HATE IT!!!

I don’t want to have to carry this stupid little brush around with my toothbrush and brush and floss and use this little brush in public bathrooms after a meal. Seriously? Really? I DON’T WANT TO!!!!

Ok, that might be it.

The truth is, when I actually use the brush, it actually doesn’t take that long and my teeth do feel cleaner.

I have only done “it” in the privacy of my home so far. The first time I put the little brush in the little hole from behind (it sounds a little kinky but trust me, it’s not), I couldn’t figure out how to get it out. I was looking in the mirror and I don’t have a good sense of direction so I kept pushing it in more and was starting to panic. Finally I figured out how to move it the right way and got it out.

I am getting better at it since that first time. But, I still don’t like it.

And, according to them, it’s really not a big deal. Talk to the hand.

LATER:

I called the dentist office and talked to my buddy at the front desk. She said I didn’t need to go crazy. Twice a day (morning and night) is fine. It’s just to keep the food out of there. And, that she also has a hole in between two teeth and it’s no big deal. It’s just like flossing.

Do I feel better? A little. I think the pain will hopefully go away as the wound heals. I will use the brush at home morning and night. And I can bring those little flossers for during the day.

I’m lucky this is my first run in with dental and gum issues, I guess. I have had good teeth all my life, so why am I whining?

I’m not, I’m just venting. I am getting into dialogue so shut up!!!!

[Who needs other people when I can fight with myself, right?]

Anyway, thanks for listening. Hope you were at least a little entertained!!!!!

Gotta go clean my hole!!!!!! (Just kidding………….sort of)

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